Dutch object pronouns: me, mij, hem, haar, hen and hun

"I see him", "call me", "give it to them" — object pronouns are everywhere. Dutch has a few more forms than English, because many pronouns come in a stressed and an unstressed version. Add the famous hen/hun question and the fact that a coat or a phone is called hem, and you have a topic worth sorting out properly.

The full table

The forms in brackets are how people pronounce the word when it's unstressed. 'm and d'r appear in very informal writing like text messages, but in normal writing you write hem and haar and simply pronounce them lightly.

Stressed or unstressed?

The unstressed forms me, je and ze are the everyday default. Use them whenever the pronoun isn't the important part of the sentence:

• Kun je me helpen? — Can you help me?
• Ik zie je morgen. — See you tomorrow.
• Ik heb ze gisteren gezien. — I saw them yesterday.

Use the stressed forms mij, jou and hen/hun when you want to emphasise or contrast the person:

• Hij belt mij, niet jou. — He's calling me, not you.
• Bedoel je mij? — Do you mean me?
• Ik vind jou leuk. — I like you (you, not someone else).

Mij is also more common in formal writing, and in some fixed expressions: Het spijt mij and Het spijt me both mean "I'm sorry", with the second being more casual.

For hem, haar, ons, jullie and u there's only one written form, so you just change your voice.

Tip: If you're unsure, go unstressed. Me, je and ze will sound natural in nine sentences out of ten.

After prepositions

After a preposition (met, voor, bij, aan, van, naast and so on), the stressed forms are the standard choice:

• Kom je bij mij eten? — Are you coming to eat at my place?
• Dit cadeau is voor jou. — This present is for you.
• Ik ga met hem naar de film. — I'm going to the cinema with him.
• Wil je naast ons zitten? — Do you want to sit next to us?

In relaxed speech, me and je are also common after a preposition when there is no emphasis: Wil je met me dansen? — Do you want to dance with me? That's perfectly fine.

One important exception: when "it" refers to a thing after a preposition, Dutch doesn't say met het or op het. Instead it uses er + preposition: ermee (with it), erop (on it), ervoor (for it).

• Dit is mijn nieuwe pen. Ik schrijf er graag mee. — This is my new pen. I like writing with it.

That's a whole topic of its own; see the word er.

Hen or hun? The rule and the reality

For "them" referring to people, standard Dutch has three options: ze, hen and hun. The official rule for the stressed forms goes like this:

• hen for a direct object and after a preposition

• hun for an indirect object without a preposition ("to them")

• Ik heb hen gisteren gezien. — I saw them yesterday.

• Ik ga met hen op vakantie. — I'm going on holiday with them.

• Ik geef hun een cadeau. — I'm giving them a present.

• Ik geef een cadeau aan hen. — I'm giving a present to them.

This rule was invented by grammarians centuries ago, and most native speakers don't follow it in speech. What people actually do:

• They mostly say ze. Ik heb ze gisteren gezien. Ik geef ze een cadeau. This is correct, natural and avoids the whole problem. Use it whenever "them" isn't stressed.
• They often use hun for everything when stressed: Ik ga met hun op vakantie. You'll hear it all the time, but in careful writing it's considered a mistake.
• You'll even hear hun as a subject: Hun hebben het gedaan (They did it). This is very common in speech but widely seen as incorrect. Use zij or ze instead.

For things in the plural, never use hen or hun. It's always ze:

• Waar zijn mijn sleutels? Ik kan ze niet vinden. — Where are my keys? I can't find them.

It: het or hem?

Here's the part that surprises English speakers. Dutch doesn't have one word for "it". The pronoun depends on the noun's article:

• het words are referred to with het

• de words are referred to with hij (subject) and hem (object)

• Waar is mijn telefoon? Ik kan hem niet vinden. — Where's my phone? I can't find it.

• Die jas is mooi. Ik neem hem. — That coat is nice. I'll take it.

• De film? Ik heb hem al gezien. — The film? I've already seen it.

• Het boek is goed. Ik heb het in twee dagen gelezen. — The book is good. I read it in two days.

• Waar is het brood? Heb jij het opgegeten? — Where's the bread? Did you eat it?

The same goes for the subject form: De trein is laat. Hij komt om tien uur. — The train is late. It's coming at ten.

In formal writing, some abstract de words (especially those ending in -heid, -ing and -tie) are treated as feminine and referred to with zij/haar: De regering heeft haar plannen gepresenteerd. In everyday spoken Dutch in the Netherlands, though, hij/hem works for almost any de-word thing. That's one more reason to learn every noun with its article; see de or het.

When het refers to a whole idea or situation rather than a specific noun, it stays het: Ik weet het niet. — I don't know (it).

Where the pronoun goes

Object pronouns like to come early in the sentence, straight after the conjugated verb (or after the subject in a question), and before time words and niet:

• Ik zie je morgen. — See you tomorrow. (Not Ik zie morgen je.)
• Ik heb hem gisteren niet gezien. — I didn't see him yesterday.
• Heb je haar al gebeld? — Have you called her yet?

With two objects, a pronoun usually comes before a full noun: Ik geef haar het boek. — I'm giving her the book. Want more? See Dutch word order.

For the formal u, the object form is the same as the subject: Kan ik u helpen? — Can I help you? Read more in formal and informal you. And for me, je and zich in verbs like zich vergissen, see reflexive verbs.

Quick summary

• Object forms: me/mij, je/jou, u, hem, haar, het, ons, jullie, ze/hen/hun.
• Unstressed me, je, ze are the default; mij, jou, hen/hun add emphasis.
• After prepositions use the stressed forms (met mij, voor jou), but met me is fine in speech.
• For things after a preposition, use er + preposition: ermee, erop.
• Official rule: hen = direct object / after a preposition, hun = indirect object. In practice, just say ze.
• Never use hun as a subject, and never use hen/hun for things.
• De-word things are hij/hem; het-word things are het.

Practise it

Talk about the people around you in Family, practise Ik neem hem with clothes and shopping in Shopping, and use je, hem and ze in real conversations in Invitations.